Poll: Can You Look?
I’m going to try something new on my blog. I’m going to try some polls about certain topics and would love you, my loyal readers, to give me some feedback. You never know, it might spur some good conversations.
So, my first question (I got this from a radio station this morning) .
If you are in a committed relationship, is it okay to check out other members of the opposite sex?
5 comments
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YES- look with your eyes, not with your hands.
i am married and I know for a fact that both my husband and I look at the other sex. wether, its in a magazine, movie, ect…
but there is a way of being respctful about it. do i get mad that i know hes looking at the girls in maxium or if i know there is a pretty girls near us, i’m sure hes looking, but he not staring or making it obvious. if he would be doing that then i would have a problem w/ that.
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Heck even I look and know when girls are pretty. Jim used to be like the guy who didn’t look but if you think about it, if he didn’t appreciate women, he wouldn’t be getting on me either! So anyway–communication is good…i like to know what he likes and of course, I’m the best for his eyes! I don’t look so much at guys cuz it’s obvious men’s bodies aren’t really that dreamy and the ones that are prob have no mind to accompany it…but if I wanted to look I’d be sure to let him know and put some humor behind it! Good thing Jim’s my ten!
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YES! We both check out the opposite sex and often talk about it with each other, too. I think it’s healthy to first of all A) appreciate the beauty of the human form; there’s a lot of lovely people out there, and B) because it can add spice to the relationship because maybe by looking at others you get excited for your squeeze.
Like Michelle said — eyes only. But let them have fun and tell your partner about it!
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I’m of the opinion (for me and my sig. other) that intentionally looking isn’t neccessarily healthy. Obviously, we are humans and we notice when a a good looking person walks by or is in our presence and we can appreciate that. I’ve even had converstions with men in my life about others around (whether they be celebreties or Joe-Blow from the street). However, I draw the line there. I’m not one to support Maxim or Playboy. I don’t think that’s healthy. Why do we need to put temptation in front of us??
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It depends on the person and the couple, however. And whether those sorts of things feed or relieve. Some men are overly sexed, to use the term, while their wives/gfs are not. Thus, a lot of pent-up tension. Would you rather in this case that they occasionally gaze at a Maxim or Playboy vs. cheating on the wife? I think so. There’s a flip side to this as well…if the guy is under a lot of stress, pressure, etc. (which happens, trust me) and is unable to get into a mood, such things can really help get his mind back onto the “task at hand” and to become interested in such things with his S.O. Many couples use porn as a catalyst for their own sexual lives because it gets them revved up during periods of stress and hassle and so forth where it otherwise wouldn’t happen. So in these cases, I think it’s a useful thing — assuming everyone in the relationship agrees.
And that last part is the point. Yes, this can be used in a negative sense, too. No doubt. But if it’s used for positive, and the partners agree, then why not?